Struggling with making a decision and saying “NO” to someone? 3 simple steps to say “no” with grace and confidence.
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Mentioned on Ep 122: How to say “NO” with Confidence. Struggling with making a decision and saying “NO” to someone? 3 simple steps to say “no” with grace and confidence.
Welcome back to The Burnout Doctor Podcast, I’m your host Dr. Jessica Louie. We are talking about 3 steps to saying “no” with grace. Thank you for sharing your action steps from our last episode on how to stop making excuses. Many of you are taking action by using our complimentary Burnout Starter Kit – don’t forget to download yours today! We all write our own stories in our lives and homes. Let’s all bring joy into home and joy into work.
When we think about making decisions, we often arrive at decision fatigue. I know I’ve felt this. When I experienced burnout, it was unbearable to make another decision outside of the work setting. Remember, the story about not being able to decide what to eat at the end of the day and taking that frustration out on each other as a couple? You can go back to episode 65 on What is the mental load?
This is similar about making decisions and feeling confident when we say “NO” to something. That “NO” could be related to a new project at work, a new job opportunity, an ask to cover for a team member, a new business opportunity, a wedding invitation, etc.
Here is my simple process for saying no with grace.
Make the decision in advance
It can take the guess work out of making difficult decisions.
In 2021, I’ve made the decisions to decline all in-person keynote speaking events and airplane travel. This alleviates the decision-fatigue that comes with big situations in my personal life and business life.
By making the decision in advance, I can say “NO” with confidence (and grace).
Decide immediately or within a pre-determined timeframe
When we are asked to make a decision, waiting on it can add significant mental clutter to our lives. We talk often about the mental load and how it affects our well-being on this podcast. Waiting on it adds mental clutter to your life. It weighs you down. If you do not respond right away using my Closing the Files technique – 2 minutes or less – do it right away then give yourself a pre-determined deadline. The deadline could be 24 hours. We do not want to overthink the decision to say “NO” to something and let to interrupt our life.
Do NOT say MAYBE
When we are about to say “NO” it can be very tempting to soften the response and say “maybe.” This is not ideal. Be clear and direct in your communication. We do not like gray-zone maybes in our lives. It continues to add mental clutter to our lives. A maybe does not serve you and does not serve the recipient.
This is a reminder that NO is a complete sentence.
Remember, how others react to your NO is not your fault. We cannot control others.
If you enjoyed the topic, you can also go back to episode 61 on How to make decisions as an action-taker!
In my Joy at Work Course, you can get even more advice and action steps on how to make decisions with confidence and how to say no with confidence.
Make sure you’re following along on our YouTube channel (youtube.com/drjessicalouie) as well with new videos going live every Saturday!
Make sure you’re implementing and taking action by implementing our Burnout Starter Kit and investing in yourself with our VIP 1:1 coaching or 1-hour strategy calls.
Until next time, spark joy my friends!
Tl;dr: Struggling with making a decision and saying “NO” to someone? 3 simple steps to say “no” with grace and confidence.
Note, my views are my own and are not associated or representative of my employer(s).
This podcast is for educational purposes only and not medical advice.