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Ever wonder if you are doing things that are NOT helping your feelings of stress and burnout? Today we talk about 7 things NOT to do when you are burned out.
Welcome back to The Burnout Doctor Podcast with Dr. Jessica Louie. Today, we are talking about why experiences are the best gifts. Thank you for sharing your action steps from our last episodes on how to set up your week for success. Many of you are taking action by using our complimentary Burnout Starter Kit and Financial Freedom Kit – don’t forget to download yours today! We all write our own stories in our lives and homes. Let’s all bring joy into home and joy into work.
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#1 NOT to do when feeling burned out: Take it out on others
I did this A LOT. Remember back to episode 2 when I talked about being angry all the time and taking it out on family. Yep me…not the best season of my life. Thank you to my boyfriend and family who haven’t left me over this – you infusing time and energy back into me to help me reset burnout was beyond nice of you. When I work with my clients who are having relationship troubles because of stress and burnout I have them ask a few questions. Before you snap at your partner or children or colleague, ask yourself…
Am I adding value to this situation?
Am I coming at this from a positive mindset? – reset your mindset is episode 9 with a free worksheet download
Can I help myself calm down with an activity?
Have a list ready to go for this – does taking a walk or doing a rigorous run/row or sitting down to journal or baking help you calm down and not let emotions be transferred to others around you.
#2 NOT to do when feeling burned out: Make major life decisions
It can be easy to feel rushed into making life decisions. Clients tell me this all the time. They feel rushed and want to make a brash decision to change jobs, quit their job, buy something to cope
I did this.
I made a major life decisions while burned out – I bought a townhouse – and moved my parents from WI to CA into it with me
Did it solve my burnout? No
Did it add to my stress levels? Yes
I made mistakes. I incurred PMI costs and closing costs from rushing into this discussion. I felt guilty over moving my mom away from the only state she knew and family she loved. And you remember from previous episodes, I shopped a LOT and some of these shopping sprees added up to thousands of dollars which can be life altering if you don’t have control of your financial well-being.
Fortunately, both of these major life decisions – the townhouse and shopping – turned out well and my financial well-being has not been affected . But they were NOT intentional life decisions.
#3 NOT to do when feeling burned out: Let yourself go
Just as the saying goes, we can’t take care of others when we don’t take care of ourselves
Just like I talked about on earlier podcast episodes comparing stress and burnout to one another, episode number 6, I was beyond physically exhausted and fatigued that I could barely get up, take a shower and show up to the ICU at 6am.
DON’T let yourself go
This is not just about appearance, because that’s not the point, it’s about not letting your moving your body habits or eating habits go out the window. And when we take care of ourselves and feel clean, fresh and put together we FEEL better. Think about when the last time you struggled and you didn’t feel like taking a shower or wiping the baby spit up off your clothing. You were constantly in yoga pants and sweats. You didn’t brush your teeth.
I’ve been there. My clients have been there. Now think about how you felt when you took time to freshen up, clean up and put on an outfit that LITE YOU UP. Maybe that was for your date night. Or girls night out. Or big work presentation. Think about how you FELT at that moment.
Now, let’s replicate that by taking care of yourself every day.
That is why I started blogging on Petite Style Script – to feel confident in our wardrobe choices – it didn’t matter where you purchased the clothing from or what size it was – it’s about feeling good about yourself, feeling pretty – which translates into feeling confident.
Women, I have free downloads on Petite Style Script to give you ideas about how to put together outfits with a small # of pieces, mix and match and style clothing simply, classically and confidently. These resources will be in the podcast show notes.
Number Four: : Keep doing things you’re doing.
Even one small change can help. Getting accountability partner is key to stay on track. I recommend an accountability partner who will be honest and direct. Sometimes that is not a loved one or family member because they let you off the hook. You can consider a coach or non-biased friend as your accountability partner.
Number Five: Dwell on it at night causing a lack of sleep each night.
I get it. In the past, I was not able to shut off my brain at night. I set up an evening routine and stuck to my boundaries. The big one is no screen time an hour before bedtime.
Number Six: Drown troubles in bottle, food, or something addictive.
I did this with emotional eating and shopping. For me, sometimes that was McConnell’s ice cream or gummy bears or clothing shopping. Overall, it ended up in physical symptoms with GI discomfort of emotional eating or hundreds of dollars out the door in clothing stores.
Number Seven: Rehash issues with anyone who will listen.
Yes, we all like to vent sometimes and get things out of our brains. If you need to do this, one option is to do this in the car as you drive home so no one else has to listen to you – your family and friends and partners are not there to be problem solvers. I honestly didn’t think about this statement before or during my burnout phase. But it is SO true. We don’t love our significant others or spouses because they solve all our problems. That is not their role in our lives. Reset yourself if you’re relying on others in this way.
Make sure you’re following along on our YouTube channel (youtube.com/drjessicalouie) as well with over 50 videos on tackling financial wealth, debt, well-being and burnout.
Make sure you’re following along on our YouTube channel (youtube.com/drjessicalouie) as well with new videos going live every Saturday!
Until next time, spark joy my friends!
Note, my views are my own and are not associated or representative of my employer(s).
This podcast is for educational purposes only and not medical advice.